"aftermath" - facing the liberty of a STUDENT



assalamualaikum peeps . starting this week maka genaplah a month before my final exam starts *dies* . jangan tnye aq psal preparation , coz semenjak internet aq laju niee asyik dok layan movie je almost every night . pagi tadi ade exam ctu a.k.a tassawur islam but too bad i`m too lazy to study last night , having a leisure-ing midnight chat until 2 a.m with my one and only , best-est buddy here nikk ammar nik aziz xD. so in conclusion night and the the day before the test . i didn`t study at all T_T . mase exam tadi lagi lerr . buku pon aq x bawak . dah lar OPEN BOOK TEST . mmg mati kering aq kat situuu ...



    its been three months but i still didn't come out from my comfort zone . still thinking that this is my honey-moon phase where i can indulge myself with things i never knew i would discover . so , to all my dear juniors . learning is such a complicated process xD after 3 months here , after going through all those exhausting phase of introducing , adapting , fasting , and festive-ing ..

    finally i knew who is a great accompany . theres always been a change in terms of friends that i could always count on during my three years here  . some people left , which is not so surprising . sometimes , aq pon mcm tuh jadi dah terlebih familiar dngn situasi . but some new people just come and keep impress me with their undeniable charm . totally the nice-est memory of my foundation years . . adat lar for those who left . live is all about accepting changes . but the memories will stay .  dunia berputar , 24hs a day . it is a process that every human must go through . it`s not a bad thing . but it is the real  nature . i am always thankful that god always filled my days here with colors and prospers.  every single day in here is like one mysterious magical diary of my life . whatever it is I`m going to keep discover . segalanya boleh berubah almost every single hours .


as long as I`m here , i would love to learn everything that this place can offer . not just from the lecture , books , tutorials .. but the knowledge that i can abstract from my friends too . every single of their advantage. laen orang , laen kebolehan . i truly truly truly wanna learn and know a lot of things . i didn`t really care about the facts that i can get just by google-ing . but im more curious in gaining knowledge by experiencing . so far aq belum satiesfied lagi dngn ap yg aq gain kat sini . nak blajar ice skate , belajar breakdance , belajar swimming even maybe lepas x de org yg nak ajar aq swim dah . haha ...

ekcelli touch n go nie aq take from my friend .. he said that pre-u years is just like touch n go . u met people , u adapt to the situation , u made memories .. and finally without even realising it . u have to go and chase ur own dream . cume usaha dan survivng skills kita that will determine where will our life take us
.. my question is  mana aq nak pergi lpas nie ? should just enjoy this moment and just let time take me where i belong .. -.-

btw , not to mention. sejak datang sini selera makan aq mmg menjadi-jadi .. asyikkkk makannnn je . tak heran kalau after finish this sem , badan aq mcm anak ikan dugong . (*_______*) ..

i guess thats all from me todayyyy . see u all next time .... gonna miss u peeps :)) assalamualaikum

SATU SEMBILAN | LAPAN | DUA SIFAR SATU EMPAT | - my Sincere Apologize as a scholar



hye peeps . this week has been a roller coaster ride for me as i`ve been busier than ever staying up all night everyday , studying ,preparing and making myself as stressful as hell :p . owh , and not to mention all those debate , presentation , assignment that can kill me from time to time . banyak kerja x settle lagi =.=  ..even kalau x buat semue tuh . aq akan sentiasa mem-busy kan diri aku dengan exploring new things .  on this entry actually i want to address my apologize note . to whom am i apologizing ? errr ... please read until the last paragraph :P haha ... actually it has nothing to do with my daily life here. its about the past memory that will always hunt me .


firstly , rasa bersalah teramat sangat kepada mak ayah aq .. sebab ... dekat sini aq rase aq banyak fooling around almost like every second , .. it`s not like i`m not studying or revising .. but the truth is i don`t feel like it is enough  .. enough of what ? enough to redeem back the fracture of wound that i`ve created in my family heart during SPM :( ...  sebenanrye sampai sekarang aq menyesal dengan result spm aq .walaupun aq tahu apa yang terjadi pasti ada hikmahnya . besides , now i think that I`m happy here . *well , kind of* ... tapi the feeling of guilt is still all over my head , mind and soul .

to mak , ayah , adek , akak , n my family . im really sorry sebab dah kecewakan semue orang . sekarang bila dah sampai sini . mulai saat ini , kami janji ... kami akan study bersungguh-sunnguh untuk tebus balek kesilapan kami . kami x kan kecewakan semua orang lagi . kami tahu mak , ayah sedih dengan ap yg berlaku . kami tahu kami dah buat semua orang rasa risau . but everything is not under my control . i`ve try my best . and now . I promise to try my hardest AGAIN . and now, i`m gonna make everything worth . I promise xD


and for now i think i shall erase all those negative thoughts of turning back and just give my best shot . i will make people proud of me . keep striving . keep studying and keep focusing  . all the adrenalin generated in me now hope wouldn`t fade away for this whole foundation years . please heart , keep on enlighten my sad life  diary  here everyday ,  deep down my heart . as the end , nothing is impossible to be achieved  :) bye peeps . :)))) assalamualaikum

   
                                           keep on smiling am :). even when happiness isn`t on your side .
                                                            things will get better . please be -_-